Saturday, March 17, 2012

10 Life Balance Commandments

Every journey begins with a first step.  Or a first blog post, as the case may be.

I remember when I first thought about the idea of blogging.  My sister and some of my friends were already "bloggers."  They were cool.  I was jealous.  For a long time, I was still just "thinking about it."  Waiting for the right time.  Or more time. Something.

Then click.  One letter typed on my little laptop. One word; one sentence; one post.  No time at all.

Like so many other things in our lives, starting was the hardest part.  And yet, so easy.  One click. 

So for anyone lurking out there who has been thinking about blogging and wanting to do it I say, "Go for it!"  You know who you are.  Really, what are you waiting for?  We're not getting any younger here people.  

To commemorate my first blogoversary, I had summarized some key messages from my blogtabulous first year.   Charlton Heston style.  Minus the beard.

Two more years later, I can think of a couple more but these all still really resonate with me.  And, given the need to actually practice what I preach, balance this week requires an encore presentation.  I reserve the right to addendum.


1. Thou shalt make myself a priority.   Life balance is about having the mental, emotional and physical strength to be able to do it all.  It's not about doing everything in just the right way.  It's about being strong enough to handle anythingTrue life balance is internal.

2. Thou shalt step outside the comfort zone.   Growth almost always involves the unknown. Go for it.  Parents, we need to let our kids step outside their (and our) comfort zones too.  Not easy, I know.

3. Thou shalt put out what I would like to get back.  Energy attracts like energy.  If we want health, happiness and prosperity then these things must be reflected in our thoughts, words and actions.  If we obsess over "sick, sad and broke" we get more of that.  Along the same lines, remember the saying, "If you meet more than two jerks in one day, chances are pretty good you're one of them." 

4. Thou shalt laugh.  I hope this one is self-explanatory.  Laughter really is the best medicine.  

5.  Thou shalt meditate and pray.  Regardless of individual spiritual beliefs, we all need time to reflect and be at a purposeful place of peace and gratitude.    When people ask me the #1 thing which keeps me sane in the face of everything I must handle in a given day, this is it.   And no, "Meditation" is not a new varietal of wine.

6. Thou shalt not treat every situation as "life and death."  Some of us are facing very serious challenges, I know.  Yet most of the things we stress and obsess about are not a matter of life or death.  We give transient issues way more power than they deserve.  Being a sensitive person myself, "Is this life or death?" is a litmus question I ask myself early and often.

7. Thou shalt control only that over which I have control.  This one should be easy but  is just so damn hard for some reason.  Here's a quick tip:  If it's another person, place or thing - we don't have any real control.   I know, I know. As a recovering control freak myself, this was hard news to me too. 

8. Thou shalt find gain in change.  The automatic human response to change is to perceive loss.  Keep this in mind when the crazy buttons start going off during any kind of transition.   It may be less about the actual event and more of a gut reaction.  Talk it out or write it down.  What are you afraid of losing?  Is that a justified fear?  What are you gaining?  Do those benefits outweigh the loss or fear?

9. Thou shalt deal with the crap.  Commandments and crap don't usually go together but I've got to keep it real.  That's just how I roll.  We all have things we don't want to think about, do, and face.  Maybe it's debt, fat, drama, projects, messes, etc...   Each person has their own "big turds."   Worse, these things have a way of getting bigger and stinkier without attention.  Bite the bullet and face the big turds.  Oh, it will suck in the short-term but you know it will be a HUGE relief afterwards.

10. Thou shalt believe in myself.  Increased confidence brings increased capacity.  Personally, I spent almost half my life believing that I wasn't good enough or that I was just really weird.    Old paradigms take work to shift.   The bottom line is that the love comes from the inside out, not the outside in.  I know it's corny but you must love and believe in yourself.   Let other people think what they want.   (Remember the whole "can't control people, places and things" bit?)

So now I know that I'm weird.  But, I also believe that weird is the new beautiful.

Carpe diem,

PS:  The photo included in this post is one I took from my kitchen window.  One of my faves!

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{ Persis Shah } said...

wow congratulations on ur one year anniversary!! ::Sigh:: i wonder when i shall have my 100+ followers =)

great commandments...i can't wait to put them into practice.

p.s it is kinda amazing how everytime i encounter a stressful situation...i get an update on blogger reg. a new motivating post on ur blog...thanks for them! they do keep me going =)

john said...

You have inspired me soo much, I love your morning view and of course the Day 27 one too :D
Id say more, but im scared and must stop following you becuase 300 is too :p

PJ said...

Congratulations Charlene! It looks like "all 4 rooms" are stocked full of good advice. 100% life-tested! To being gentle to ourselves and others ... "The art of being yourself at your best is the art of unfolding your personality into the person you want to be. . . . Be gentle with yourself, learn to love yourself, to forgive yourself, for only as we have the right attitude toward ourselves can we have the right attitude toward others."
-Wilfred Peterson

Rae said...

Congratulations. You have developed a really great blog. It is a pleasure to read it.

Sarah said...

congrats! you must be very proud of yourelf - and should be. thank you for being such an inspiration!!

Serenityville said...

FABulous post, as always!! Can I ask how you got so many friggin followers in only 100 posts? I mean, obviously you're a super blogger, but besides being great, any special tips you can pass along?

Serenityville said...

ok, and number 10? I LOVE IT! It's completely up my alley - I can totally relate to the authentic self idea, finding it after many years. I'm 36 and have just started that wonderful part of my life's discovery - learning to love the self, as we say. Yay for you! I love your blog!!!

Melissa B. said...

Oh, a bloggy anniversary is always so fun...congratulations, you Superior Scribler, you!

The Saturday Sphinx

Tony Anders said...

Well done, and thanks as always for your inspiring words. I always appreciate people who spend a portion of their lives trying to make the world they live in a little better. Keep it up!

Plentymorefishoutofwater said...

Congrats love.

Rachel Cotterill said...

I came across from SITS to wish you a happy first year - now following to see what you have to say over the next year or seven ;)

Dr. T.L. Sanderfer said...

Congratulations! I have chosen you to receive The Best Blog award!
Here is a link to the rules:
And here is the link to the award image:
I have been both entertained and inspired by your blog. Keep on blogging, and please check out my Jan. 30st post for a list of other blogs I feel worthy of the title Best Blog. May God bless you!
Dr. T.L. Sanderfer

Eileen said...

Congratulations on your blogoversary! Those are great 10 commandments ~ I thought, if I atleast follow the 1st and 10th, everything else will fall in place! :)

Happy SITS Saturday, have a great rest of the weekend!

Charlene said...

@Persis Shah - Thanks! You'll get to 100 in no time. And yes, we usually get what we need when wee ned. Ask, believe, receive! :-)

@John - Try no to scare the neighbors, will ya?! Things are going to get better for you - I just know it!

@PJ - Great words! As you know, I'm a fan of "all four rooms." Keep up your great blogging!

@Rae - Thanks - that means to me coming from you. You rock!

@Sarah - The trick is really inspiring myself to practice what I preach on an ongoing consistent basis.

Charlene said...

@Serenity - I think it's the same as "networking" in real life and business; I try to make my message focused and interesting and then get out there and tell people about it. SITS, the Blogger Coffee Shop and other communities have brought me some great bloggy friends!

@Melissa - Thanks Mother Superior! (LOL!)

@Tony - Likewise. Thank YOU!

@Fish - Does this mean you'll re-follow me now? (heehee)

@Rachel - Thanks SITStah!! Appreciate the visit!

@Dr. T.L. - I am honored and will be by soon. Thanks!

@Eileen - Absolutely SITStah, I agree. Thanks for stopping by.

Melissa @ Cellulite Investigation said...

Hi, Charlene. I just commented behind you in the SITStahs lineup. I love finding great new blogs like that!

My favorite points here are #3 and #4. I just interviewed one of the world's foremost lymphatic experts about the link between lymphatic congestion and cellulite. He told me his favorite way to care for the lymphatic system is through laughing! He said it helps stimulate the thoracic duct and the main lymphatic vessels in the chest, to increase circulation. What a great side effect! Thank for this encouraging post.

Kate said...

Congratulations on the anniversary. I lvoe your commandments definiately good ones to live by.

Kate xx

tammy said...

Very wise and encouraging words there. ;) I just LOVE, LOVE, LOVE your view from your window. Seriously trying not to be jealous.

Stopping by from SITS to say Hi and Happy Blogoversary!!

Louise said...

Wow! You've achieved so much with your blog in such a short time. Congratulations from Italy.

Charlene said...

Melissa - You realise I am going to be laughing CONSTANTLY now. LOL!!

Thanks to Katie, Tammy & Louise for visiting and your kind words. Cheers!!

Hunter said...

Very cool. Congratulations!

Janine said...

Congrats on you 100th post!! You ghave a great blog :)

Sarah said...

These are great - and I love your blog! I agree that people who are thinking about blogging should just jump in. In fact, I just managed to convince a friend who is really interested in getting started to do so.

Charlene said...

Oh crap - I thought of a #11. THOU SHALT BE GRATEFUL. Oh well. Thanks!

C. M. Dobson said...

Congratulations a day late! And Happy Anniversary from a new follower.

Vivianne's Vista said...

Congratulation Charlene! I don't know how you do it, your blog is so consistently inspiring and humorous! I always leave with a smile. You rock! Thank you for the life inspirations.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, you should have started with gratitude! But thanks for all the posts, including this.


foxy said...

Weird IS the new beautiful! LOVE the commandments! Happy blogoversary!!!

webb said...

But so lovably weird. keep up the good work/blog - much good common sense comes out of it. Happy Blogoversity!

The Guy's Perspective said...

Not only loving yourself, but forgiving and accepting yourself. And that's not easy!

Inspiring post!

Richard said...

Congrats on your achievements! You have such a nice, interesting, and enjoyable blog! Thank you for all your time and effort!

Life with Kaishon said...

Congratulations on 100 posts : ). How exciting. I am visiting today for the very first time. I can tell by your pretty smile and kind eyes that you are a lovely person! Hope you have many more wonderful blog experiences! So glad to have met you on SITS today!

Crystal said...

Great list! Visiting from SITS. :)

~Shelley~ said...

Happy "Blogoversary"!!!!

TC said...

Congratulations, I know there are hundreds like me who feel you are a personal friend, that is your gift... to make us all feel special.
And a wonderful post to boot.

Angie said...

Your blog is lovely, great work! Congrats and keep it up!

Charlene said...

I'm getting around to thanking everyone more personally but in the meantime, THANKS EVERYONE!!

Janine said...

I left a comment earlier, but I just wanted to tell you that there's a little something for you here :)

{ Persis Shah } said...

Hello, I just passed on the Sunshine Award to you for your fabulous blog!

Please check to accept it.

Have a lovely day!

~ Persis.

Charlene said...

More awards - YAY!!! Thank you Janine & Persis! :-)

Crystal Escobar said...

Happy Blog Anniversary!
I love your commandments. #1 #2 and #10 were my favorites :) You're very inspirational!

Kandia said...

Love the ten commandments especiallythe don't treat everything like life and death. I was pretty bad about that for a while until I learned I need to be picky about the things I stress about, can't stress out about everything...takes way too much time and I love number 2 as well. I try to get in as much laugh time as possible, since perspective is everything.

fairy princess said...

Totally loving these 10 Commandments, and I shall certainly be using them for myself!! THANK YOU!!
I love your blog by the way! :-)

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