Kathy Freston actually warned me in her book that kicking caffeine could cause fatigue, irritibility and headaches at first. Check, check and double check. The headache was the worst. How could I have forgotten this from the last time I gave up caffeine? I guess if a woman can "forget" the pain of pushing something the size of watermelon out of a part of her body which is normally the size of a small pea, anything is possible.
To add to today's fun I had some dental work, a few stressful meetings and a deadline on a big project.
After work, I had a birthday party to attend. I went prepared with my little bag o' goodies, i.e. vegan butter for corn-on-the-cob, hummus, some awesome gluten-free crackers and my seltzer water. They had a fruit and olive tray which was great.
Still, no cake for me. And no wine.
This will shock everyone who knows me -- actually, it surprised me -- but the cake was harder to resist than the wine. (And don't let me kid you, I desperately wanted a glass of wine after the day I had!) I literally had to leave the room at one point.
The great thing about having a four-year old boy is that they don't sit in one place for very long. Chasing Spiderman around was a welcome distraction.
As I meditate on my struggles of the day, I'm gaining deeper understanding of what this "cleanse" is meant to do. There's a twinkle of awareness appearing far beyond the idea of simply cleansing the body or anything to do with "dieting" at all.
Here's the thing: A central theme to this blog and my "Personal Strategic Management" methodology is that we can find a sense of inner peace and security of self which allows us to be truly happy and healthy no matter what is happening externally.
I'm starting to see that despite my passionate belief in this philosophy, I actually have some major external dependencies. As my sucky day clearly illustrated, I'm attached to my coffee in the morning, glass of wine in the evening and cake... well, anytime!
This awareness makes me more excited to continue this journey. It gives me the energy that I may well need to get through a few more days of "detox" symptoms.